My boyfriend wants to marry me but I don't have a drivers license. Will this hugely affect our relationship/marriage?
I have terrible anxiety about driving and it's crippled me my entire adulthood. I am almost 27. MY heart begins to beat out of my chest as soon as i get in the driver's seat. I have been avoiding going to therapy but i'm finally deciding to get help for this because I know it's not normal to be this afraid. I am going to make it my duty to get in counseling and overcome this so I can be an independent adult. I can't even drive myself to the grocery store without having a major panic attack and black out. I don't want to live like this. I don't want to live in a constant state of extreme fear and paranoia. I am worried this will consume me and my future marriage will be on the rocks because of it. My boyfriend is 35 and wants to marry me. He says he loves me, we've been together for 4 years and he's not getting any younger. He wants to get married very soon within this year but the problem is once we get married and move in together he will have to drive me everywhere until I can get my license and it will be a huge burden on him. I am afraid he will resent me for it. Right now, It's not really that stressful for him because the driving is dividided amoung my dad, my mom, and him so he doesn't have to do ALL the driving everyday. My mom will take me to work, my dad takes me to the grocery store, and my boyfriend will take me to the bank and other mischellanious places, sometimes he will also pick me up from work. my boyfriend never complains about having to drive me places.
Answers
Harris
Get help for your driving fears and do this before considering marriage. You really need to maintain some degree of independence when you're in a serious relationship.
Max Hoopla
It doesn't seem to have caused problems so far.
petrof_skinsky
Have an in-depth conversation about this with him. Explain your fears about your being too dependent on him. See what he has to say. Develop a plan together about what to do about all this.
Was this article helpful?